I think any "diet" that sends you all your food in the mail is highly suspect.

But that's just me.

I'm not even going to bother pretending to be profound in this one,

cause I'm too excited.

I ORDERED LE CHEMIN/300 LESIONS OFF AMAZON.

!!!!!!


(those are Kyo CDs for those losers who don't love them)

Dammit.

Every time I cough, I hiccough at the same time and it's really weird.

So I'm alone in the house and all I've done is watch The Mummy (classic) and make buttercream frosting for dinner. And squeeze some orange juice. At least I'm not at that god-awful hockey game with the 5 $ cotton candy. And it's not even that good. Yes, they really can screw up cotton candy. Hard to believe, huh?

Tous les jours, faudra-t-il que je coure, Jusqu'au bout.

I'm living a life of utter scandal and pain and drugs and fun. But only in my head. I swear I'm not crazy, just young and bored. Young and bored and starving for real controversy. I do what I can at school, but you know, there's only so far you can go without getting expelled. And I have a feeling I wouldn't last long in normal school.

Pour connaître l'amour et le monde, Il faudra que je coure.

I really have a thing for stealing Kyo's lyrics. I can't help it, I love them. They are moody French boys who make excellent music, and I am extremely attracted to that. Their basist has dreads and wears a skirt. Yes, excellent.

Je voudrais m'arrêter, Je peux plus respirer dans ce monde.

No one seems to wonder anymore. Where did the universe come from? Is there a reason for our being here? Does free will exist? Does it matter? Does anything matter? Are we born instinctively knowing the difference between right and wrong, or are we taught? People tend to brush me off when I ask these questions...I'm just curious, honestly...a bit to existential for my own good, I suppose.

Et je saigne encore.

I'm watching out the window, waiting. But I don't want you to think I'm the type of person who does watch out their window, waiting. Even though I am doing just that. For what is anyone's guess. For a life. For an indentity. For a red-hot poker to stick up my nose and scramble up the part of my brain that wants to know things, so I can pull it out, like the Egytians. Because it's obsolete. I don't need it anymore.

Je n'ai plus de souffle, je veux que l'on m'écoute.

Des milliers de bras tendus
Dans le vacarme de ma venue
Mon dieu qui je suis ?
J'ai laissé ma solitude
Ma maison est un véhicule
Sur mon passage on jure on crie
Je suis perdu à jamais dans une autre vie

Je n'sais plus qui je suis
Je tremble un peu je prie
On m'aimait bien ma rue
On me juge dans mon pays

Tout en haut de l'édifice
Brillant sous les lumières factices
Je n'vois plus mon chemin
Aujourd'hui j'ai tant d'amis
Où sont ceux qui m'ont vu grandir ?
Je les ai vu partir
Je m'suis perdu à jamais dans mon avenir

Je n'sais plus qui je suis
Je tremble un peu je prie
On m'aimait bien ma rue
On me juge dans mon pays

Qui je suis ?
Je sors seulement la nuit
Aujourd'hui j'ai peur de vivre
Demain j'aurai peur qu'on m'oublie

Tant pis

Je n'sais plus qui je suis
Je tremble un peu je prie
On m'aimait bien ma rue
On me juge dans mon pays

Qui je suis ?
Je sors seulement la nuit
Aujourd'hui j'ai peur de vivre
Demain j'aurai peur qu'on m'oublie

Tant pis

Tant pis

I'm frustrated.

I'm confined to such a very small part of the world.

Just reading about wars and death in textbooks is alienating,

so much so that people don't realize it's real.

I don't give a shit about the politics of war,

all I know is that every day, thousands of people are killed,

their homes destroyed, their families lost.

I wish I didn't know this.

I wish people would realize that it effects them, too,

whether they care or not.

...because this is so freaking hilarious.

[link]

Seriously, I am in tears.

If that's not a justification for every remotely sexual thing I have done, I don't know what is.